I Got Pulled Over Today.

So….today I got pulled over about 15 feet from the front of my building on my way to work for rolling a stop as I was putting my seatbelt on. I just left it unbuckled so he didn’t think I was trying to pull one over on him.

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: Because I’m an idiot.
Officer: [grinning] Well.
Me: I rolled a stop. Stupid. [awkwardly] I am… stupid.
Officer: Yeah.
Me: I’m sorry. That was….I’m sorry.
Officer: [giving me that odd look like maybe noone has apologized for driving like a moron] Where are you going?
Me: To work. Shit…yeah…I’m late for work.
Officer: Do you know what happens when you roll a stop in front of a cop?
Me: Uh …you get…. pulled over?
Officer: And?
Me: [Having a highschool SAT flashback] You go broke and have to live in a van?
Officer: [laughs] Yeah.
Me: [daydreams of what it would be like to be best friends with a cop]

Officer: Do you want a ticket?

Me: [to hawaii maybe….amiright?…No that’s stupid] No?….Sir?
Officer: Go to work. And what have we learned?
Me: Don’t roll stops?
Officer: Don’t roll stops….in front of an officer.
Me: Yes sir. Thank you.
Officer: Put your seatbelt on.


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